Building a Program
12/18/2018 12:00:00 PM | The People
Growing up, it had always been hockey, hockey, hockey.
I'm one of six Dunne children along with Jessica, Josh, Josey, Joy and James and we all love the game.
My older sister Jessica, who was a Buckeye, is 14 months older than me and my brother Josh, who plays for Clarkson, is 18 months younger. The three of us did everything together as kids, which is how I got into hockey in the first place. Josh loved sports and he went to play hockey so I said to myself 'alright, if you're doing ballet with me, I'll go do hockey with you.' We tried it and ended up having a knack for it. When it came time where we had to pick one sport, there was no question it was going to be hockey.
Although I grew up playing between the St. Louis Lady Blues AAA and the '97 AAA Jr. Blues programs with Jess, Josh and I got the chance to play together on the Blues U16 AAA guys team my final year with the program. Because I was the only girl on the team, he got stuck being my roommate.
I feel really fortunate that I grew up in St. Louis because a lot of the National Hockey League Blues' alumni like Jeff Brown, Al MacInnis, Jamie Rivers and Keith Tkachuk all gave back because their kids were all part of the Blues AAA program. They were really involved in youth hockey which makes it what it is. I also got the opportunity to play for coach Jordan Janes during my time as a Blue. Even though he wasn't an NHL alum, he's had a lasting impact on my career. To this day, he still supports his players like they're still playing for him and I'm incredibly grateful for the chance to play for him. There are some really great coaches in St. Louis. I feel really fortunate to have had that coaching.
It was about two weeks before I was set to come to Ohio State in the summer of 2015.
We were coming home from a hockey road trip and it was around three in the morning. As I was pulling my bag out from the back of the car the trunk was coming down. I stood up and smacked the back of my head against it.
When I hit my head I was tired and dizzy. I had gone through a concussion in February but this one was different. I was feeling better but looking back I don't think I was 100% so I think it was that second bump that pushed me over the edge and almost out of hockey for good.
In addition to the issues with my head, Ohio State was dealing with issues of its own.
I was recruited by Nate Handrahan but he was let go by the time I got to campus for my freshman year. Former Olympic gold medalist Jenny Potter was brought in and things didn't exactly get better from there.
I was still dealing with concussion issues and life without hockey continued for me. Even if I would start to get my heart rate up even the slightest bit and I would feel so sick. Any sort of light made me want to throw up. I was able to drive alright but if I was in the passenger's seat, the motion would make me want to be over a trash can. I didn't sleep at all.
Oh yeah, and I was a college student now, but even that was a problem. When I started school at OSU, I'd walk to class and I'd leave because I would feel so sick.
On one occasion, I hadn't slept all night. I was running a little bit late to Spanish class and I walked quickly to try and get there. By the time that I made it to class, I remember walking into class feeling dizzy. My teacher asked me if i needed to go home. She said that I was pale and my eyes were super dark.
With the concussion came depression and anxiety. You can't really explain it to someone who hasn't had one. You're really not yourself. That makes it worse because you do things or act in certain ways and you say to yourself 'This is not me. I don't know who this is.' It was a complete spiral effect.
The year with coach Potter, I was lost. It was the first year without hockey for me. Battling the mental side of things, it was really hard. I felt lonely because I didn't really get to engage with the girls. I didn't travel. Sometimes I couldn't even come to the rink because I didn't feel good. I felt like I lost a lot of relationships that I could've made. On top of that, we finished 10-25-1, our worst record in almost a decade.
The summer before my first real season as a Buckeye was when I started to feel like myself again.
But just when things were getting better, they seemed to get worse.
With a few weeks before my first game as a Buckeye, coach Potter was removed. I was thinking 'What is going on? Is our program going to get cut?' Our season was starting and we don't even have a coach. It was laughable at times. We were the only team in the country that didn't have a coach. The Buckeye men's coaches were coming out and running our practices. Great coaches, by the way, no wonder they are so good.
By this point, some teammates of mine had transferred out of the program and I was considering doing the same.
But Ohio State is unlike any other university in the country.
Yeah, coach Handrahan recruited me, but the place sells itself.
Jess was already here and my grandpa lives in Pickerington, about 20 minutes from campus. The tradition this place has, going to football games and talking to players, they loved it and had so much pride in the school.
I'm glad Jess chose here, because if she didn't, I wouldn't have looked here to be honest.
I thought about leaving, but I believed in the school and I believed in the program. A huge reason I wanted to come to Ohio State was because I wanted to help build something.
After watching them for a year, there were girls I was really impressed with. I wanted to stick around for them. A lot of our team is made up of under the radar players who didn't have the opportunity to go to Minnesota or Wisconsin.
I liked Minnesota a lot, they have an incredible university and I can't say enough good things about their program and coaches, but when you hear the cliché 'this school feels right,' it didn't.
Ohio State did.
And then Nadine Muzerall was brought in.
'Muz' was all in from the beginning. She uprooted her life to come be our head coach. She also wanted to help build the program and create a new culture.
That season that was put together in weeks, we finished 14-18-5. While the competitor in me always wants to win, it was a year that I didn't take for granted. I wanted to enjoy it and not take it for granted. Before the concussion, I got so caught up in my performance. After, it was all big picture. I was telling and asking myself, 'This is a great sport. Am I having fun?'
I wasn't afraid of playing, but I was afraid of the pressure. I was afraid that I wasn't going to be the player that I was because I wanted to perform well. Not being that player right off the bat was frustrating. Doubt crept into my mind.
Last season, everything changed for the better and then some.
I didn't expect to go to the Frozen Four last year. Looking on paper, I thought our roster was as good as any, especially with some of the talent around the country preparing for the winter Olympics in Pyeongchang, South Korea. Our goaltending was very good. We had a talented team. We really came together and were a special group.
"Last season, everything changed for the better and then some."
The first time we swept Wisconsin – the number one team in the country – was probably one of the coolest moments this program has ever had. The coolest part about it was that it was a complete team win. All four lines contributed and you could feel the energy, the love and the support for one another.
When we found out that we were going to our first ever NCAA Tournament in the airport on the way back from the WCHA Tournament, that was amazing.
The Boston College NCAA Quarterfinal game was one of the most fun games I've ever played. The whole team was loose, we had so much energy and we were genuinely having fun when we were on the ice. The Eagles had the top line in the country who had probably put up more points than our entire team combined.
In my opinion, we should've won it all.
I for sure thought we were going to beat Clarkson in the Frozen Four. We had momentum, we took it to them all game and us to get beat in overtime, it was devastating.
So far so good this year. We're a Top-10 team in the country with room to improve. By the time March arrives, it's going to come down to consistency and fire. We have a lot of skill on our team but we do our best work when we grind other teams down, forecheck hard, win battles and play with grit. Most importantly, we play for the girl next to us. Individual success, is team success.
The program I came here to help build is built and we'll continue to build on it.
We're a family.
"The program I came here to help build is built and we'll continue to build on it. We're a family."
As for me, I'm feeling hungry. I want to get back to the Frozen Four and win the whole thing. I've been involved with USA Hockey since I was 15 and the 2022 Beijing Olympics are on my mind. That would be a dream come true, but who knows?
With hockey, I've been super blessed. I don't want to be complacent. Complacency is a giant that will keep you down in life. It's not for me. After an entire year where I was limited, I want to see what my limits are. I want to be the best defenseman, teammate and captain I can be for these girls. I want to leave a legacy.
If being my best takes me to the next level, I'll go from there.
